When I first started fasting for our marriage, I did so with the attitude of “that man has to change!”
I knew the intent for fasting was to “to loose the chains of injustice and untie the cords of the yoke…Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear,” (Isaiah 58:6,8)
But, you see, fasting isn’t intended to be some magic wand we get to wave around when we need someone or some thing changed.
It’s intended to deepen our dependency on God, not just be an activity we put ourselves through in hopes of a granted prayer.
I soon realized fasting wasn’t about what I could get from God as much as it was how He was beginning to transform me.
Fasting changed my heart. Not God’s mind.
Today, I am thankful for my angry, self righteous approach to fasting because it proves to a greater extent the greatness God is working in me and my marriage.
What about you? Is there some place in your marriage that could use some healing?
Even if you already have a strong healthy marriage, could it still be blessed by regular fasting? Regular petitioning of our God?
Here are a few ways my heart and attitudes have changed to influence my marriage in a positive way.
Fasting helps me maintain a clear mind and eternal perspective.
When I remove a need it magnifies my dependency on God. I am able to see how God has provided for me thus far and realize how much greater He is than me.
God becomes bigger and I become smaller.
Regularly coming back to this realization, keeps me focused on the bigger picture. I become more clear minded and more assured that He is in control.
Fasting teaches me to extend grace and forgiveness more freely.
Honestly, I appreciate being forgiven. Being reminded of how willingly God forgives me, helps me extend the same grace more freely and with a more ready heart. (Matthew 6: 14-15)
Through a more gracious attitude, I am able to rise above whatever mood I am in and respond better toward my husband.
Fasting helps me put our marriage in the hands of God, not the hands of my husband.
In a deepened relationship with Christ, we will become more and more assured of His ability to save and transform any situation we are in. When we know that God is for us, we are filled with a blessed assurance that is far greater than any earthly man could possible give us.
Trusting God to make my marriage one of great joy to me, was difficult for me at first. But, in doing so I released my husband from the strain of measuring up to what I thought he should be and turned him over to who God intends him to become.
So, no, God didn’t change my husband first. He changed me. My own heart was in need of softening. And when God showed up in that space I created for Him, even when that space was created with the wrong attitude, He did greater things than I could have imagined.
Today, I encourage you to start fasting for your marriage once a week, once a month, or however the Spirit prompts you. In biblical times fasting was associated with the removal of food, however, today there are many things we can fast from and different lengths of time to engage in the fast.
So be it one meal, a week long juice fast, or a time without social media, remove something you regularly depend on and expect God to fill that void in great and mighty ways.
Will you join me in fasting? What are some things you could fast from? How have you seen God work through fasting in the past?
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